I had a Gi Joe when I was a kid …. yes I played with dolls! And I had an Action Jackson too. One of them, Joe or Jackson – I cant remember, had a rip cord. Oldies like me will remember the toys that had a piece of string with a white ring on the end. You pulled this string and the toys would say things.  In a robotic voice the toys would say things like, “YOU – ARE – IN – DANGER” or “ACTION -JACKSON -IS- MY- NAME- BOLD- ADVENTURE- IS- MY- GAME”  After a time the string would break. Secretly Joe used to find his way into my sisters Barbies and get naughty – just like on Number 96 … SHHHHHHH that’s my secret.

Tony Abbot reminds me a lot of Action Jackson. He has the same firm jaw line … his hair, even his chest hair, is never out of place even after swimming 200 kms and cycling for another 15  000.  And I swear he has a rip cord tucked away in his Speedos. Pull it and he will repeat verbatim –  “I promise to end the waste, to pay back the debt. To stop the big new taxes and to stop the boats.”  What fun, lets do that again RRIIIIIIIPPPPPPPPP – “I promise to end the waste, to pay back the debt. To stop the big new taxes and to stop the boats.” ONE MORE TIME – RRRRRRIIIIIIIPPPPPP – “I promise to end the waste, to pay back the debt. To stop the big new taxes and to stop the boats.” WOOOOO HOOOOO!

Julia is of course GI Julia – She has a rip cord too. Pull Julia’s cord and you will hear Peter Costello’s  mocking voice saying, “Merving Ferward” making fun of her apparent nasally tones. This is her catch cry and it means MOVING FORWARD.  Julia will be talking about something or other, usually about Tony Abbott and his love affair with Work Choices. Julia will say, “Tony Abbott is determined to bring back Work Choices and he will stop Australia ….”  At this point one of her staffers will pull her rip cord RRRRRIIIIIIPPPP and she will say – ” … Merving Ferward”  Or she will be claiming credit for Australia weathering the global financial crisis – “Labor’s economic policy has seen Australia have the lowest debt in the Western World. Because of Labor Australia is …..”  – RRRRRRIIIIIPPPPPP – “.. Merving Ferward.”

I for one am fed up with our politicians treating us like Morons. Everything is stage managed and detail is limited. It is not too much to expect our politicians give us credit for intelligence. They can kiss all the babies they want, they can fillet fish, wear hard hats, swim to Tasmania and have touched up photo shoots in Women’s Weekly – All I want is to know the detail. Give me that and I will know which way to vote. At the moment I just see these two stage managed puppets with no personality. It is looking more and more like its the donkey. Donkey for PM I say !